Bliss

Yesterday morning I was awakened by Dash's caress for a little morning delight. I do not know where he is buying his bottled water lately but somebody get me the name of his supplier. I could get used to this!

Mind you I am in no way complaining it's just unusual. During the first 4 months of our relationship twice a day 3 times a week was normal, you know that 'newlywed stage'. The following 8 months dwindled slightly to once 3 times a week, still very respectable in my eyes. Then we moved from a small town where he was working 8 hour days to a huge city where he was working 12 hour days and spending 2 hours in transit.

Needless to say it dwindled further to once a week on his day off. Still livable. About 4 months into the second year it dwindled still further to once every 3 weeks, fighting had encroached our lives. (Not about sex).

Let me be absolutely clear here. I am a very sexual creature. I do NOT think sex is the end all be all of a healthy relationship but it makes me feel desired and somewhat secure. I think it's important to meet your partners needs.

Anyway, Dash says "sex should be an extension of the way you feel" (and I swoon) he also says "I don't NEED sex" (which for me hearing such a thing from a guy is like "yeah right"). And this is right about the time I have to remind myself Dash is definitely NOT like other guys.

SO, let me illustrate. We both decided to quite smoking on the same day. (Big mistake! HUGE!) A small spat about something so stupid I can't even remember what started it, this spat gains momentum and volume level on both sides, we're screaming at each other for like an hour, he gets in his car and leaves. I'm thinking "you fool, you've finally done it, drove him literally away - probably for good". I figured he'd go to a bar start drinking end up at a strip club and not come home 'til the next morning. Yeah it was that horrible. He comes back 15 minutes later, sits calmly down on the couch and in that voice of utter love and pain he says "So what do you want to yell about no".

Holy fuck the man came back so I could yell at him, get it out of my system so we could move on and that was when I knew there wasn't much on the planet I could do to make him stop loving me.

This man's soul thirsts for understanding, that his loyalty and honor insist he provide for his woman. Perfect peace, perfect happiness, no sacrifice large or small to ensure such things would be to much for him to make. He would undo his own world, his own happiness, his own dreams to give me anything I ask.

He is loving, patient, kind to everyone he meets, affectionate, understanding, patient I only say it again because it's alot when you have to deal with my array of shit. He is gorgeous, his eyes are like embers, light brown and a fire dances behind the iris, when he looks at me, he not only sees me but into me, he believes I can be everything, no... he believes I already am. Through his eyes I love who I am, who he makes me. Thru him I am truly and forever beautiful outside and in.

It is a love I've never known before or ever will again. That's cliche' and I'm probably making you sick with all this mushy stuff, but if I could give this gift to everyone in the world no matter the personal cost to me I would wish it. Wish it for you, wish it for people I hate.

They say the kind of love twin flames have(which is so much more than soul mates) burn so intensely that they can not remain together. But his heart, his soul, his mind (which I loved even before I ever saw him) were forged in dragon's breath fire and I was the blue flame. We are of the same mold, the same medal. There is no place on earth, in the cosmos on this fucking hell of a planet that I belong the way I belong to and with him. It is a love that transcends death, time, and yes even eternity...